Adverse circumstances and conflict in my life have taught me some very valuable lessons. Some are practical and make sense, and some are difficult to understand or explain because they are spiritual in nature. Probably the most important thing I've learned has been the power and value of forgiveness. Without it I was headed down a path of bitterness and self-destruction in early adulthood. I've written a brief explanation here. I could write much more, and probably will. I believe it's good to meditate and explore the positives of life, even if they started as negatives.
Forgiveness brings the greatest reward to the soul when:
1. It isn't requested.
2. It makes no sense at all.
3. It's humanly and emotionally impossible.
4. It's given just because.
5. It's a decision, not a feeling.
2. New room in the soul for wonderful feelings.
3. Peace that really is like a river.
4. New order and control of emotions.
5. Joy and healing.
And it might even bring about reconciliation in time, but if not the rewards
are still immeasurable against the cost of holding on to the unforgiveness.
Forgetting the offense takes a little longer and will likely never be total. But the memories can only begin to fade into the background and lose importance with that first conscious decision to forgive.
I've been told and believe that forgiving also releases the offender to other
consequences of their behavior. We are not to be our own avengers or carry that load.
Bottom line, forgiveness opens the door for us to move on and grow as opposed to being stuck in a negative place. I've been forgiven for so much, so how can I fail to do the same. Then there is the item of self-forgiveness, but that's a topic for another day.