Monday, June 22, 2015


How do I explain an 18 month gap in blogging, or do I need to excuse myself?  It's been an unusual time, mostly about my Mom, her escalating dementia and her final acute illness. I could try to describe my own feelings and stresses related to her illness, but they pale in comparison to the nightmare she must have been living with daily. Since her passing on March 31 this year, I have felt grief, but also a sense of relief for her escape into eternity in heaven. She struggled so valiantly to hang on to reality, but while losing that battle more and more, I know she longed to leave this life on earth behind. I've struggled with mixed feelings. From about 1998 when I moved back to Iowa, to live near her, until about 2012, we became more like friends than we ever were before. I miss those times terribly and wish we could have had more of that. But at the same time I want to forget the tough times of the last 2 to 3 years.

Somehow I need to close that door, let go of unpleasant memories, put the good ones in storage and open the door to life and new experiences again. It's not that I stopped everything these past months, but there was like a fog hanging over each day. First on the agenda is the continuing great crochet project. Mom left hundreds of skeins of yarn and 3 unfinished afghans. Two are finished and I'm about to finish the third. Then I'll decide what to make with the rest or give it away. Her estate matters are being settled and still need attention. Some of her remaining possessions have been added to my own clutter to be dealt with. Yes, I'm still a pack rat and still working on that.

Summer vacations will include a camping trip and a visit to my sis and family in IL. So it's like the fog is lifting and joy is seeping back in. Hope to continue sharing happy thoughts and some more lively experiences here without so much time between posts.

In Loving Memory
1922 - 2015

"Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning."-Psalm 30:5